So that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything!

Everything We Do and Say Matters as Parents! Pt 2 of 2

One of life’s realities is that, everything we say and do matters.   Our actions and our words have power to both negatively and positively change the lives of others.  In particular we have been looking at the context of parenting.

Here are the last 2 reminders for us parents from yesterday’s post.

3 Helpful Reminders for us Parents

1. Affirm their belonging.

2. Invest time with them.  Jesus and the Father have real intimacy.  There exists a relationship of epic proportions between Jesus and the Father, much of which we will never fully grasp.  We can safely assume that for all of eternity past and future there exists an investment in time between the Father and Jesus.

Intimacy changes and develops age-appropriately between a parent and child.  Intimacy is not just about sports and commonalities.  What is important is time and even more importantly, quality time.  If I spend all day with my son and yet there is not a sense of joy, enjoyment or connection then I’ve really not invested anything that will return a profit to either of us.  Conversely, if I only am able to spend an hour of the day with my son due to work or other obligations – that hour better matter to him and be significant.

The bottom line is that investing time in our kids has to be an intentional move on our part.  We cannot assume, “my kids don’t want to spend time with me so I don’t try anymore.”  Get over it and invest!

3. Model grace.  Most of us want so desperately to instill great character into our kids.  One of the most effective ways to do that is to live a life of grace and extend grace to your kids and others.  This is a posture of the heart that understands deep within that we fall very short in many areas and that God has so graciously extended grace and forgiveness to us so we might extend it to others.

What does this look like?  It looks like us working to understand before jumping to conclusions (which I’m prone to do) with our kids.  This means seeking to understand the reason behind a behavior before punishing it.  This means that sometimes we let our kids “off the hook” when they have done something wrong for no other reason then because God let’s us off the hook everyday.  This looks like us showing love and grace to other adults in our lives.

So what have you experienced as a parent?

How have you seen your kids respond positively or negatively to your words and behavior?

I would love to hear from you!


  1. Peter McManus says:

    Nice, Matt! The one comment I’ll make having daughters spread out over 23 years is that we, as parents, also will make mistakes in our lives. Hiding those mistakes from our children deprives them of the example we can provide in learning from mistakes and not letting them define us for the future.

    • mattheinricy says:

      Hi, Peter. Great point! Our kids need to see us not only make mistakes but own them and work through them and learn from them. Thanks for sharing your thoughts!

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